“You Are Not Alone”

“You have strength in you. Believe in yourself because you are not alone. Find your will power from within or your family… you MUST try. If not, you will never know.”

Named after the benevolent Mother Mary, Lokamatha is a strong believer in self-reliance and perseverance. Her strength is drawn from lived experiences. Growing up amidst a war that spanned nearly her entire life and continues to affect her children, her story is one of resilience.

During the civil war in the 1990s, Lokamatha’s family moved from Talawakelle in the Central Province to Vallippunam in the Northern Province. Her father farmed the land and took on daily wage work to support their family of seven. She married in 2001, and her husband joined her family in cultivating their land in Mullaitivu, an area deeply affected by conflict until 2009.

After the war, the family was displaced and was able to return to their village in 2011. Her husband joined the Civil Defense Force, and Lokamatha took on irregular wage labor to support their three children.

“My husband used to send me letters and poems,” she recalls with a soft smile. “We had a good and happy life together.”

The consequences of the war continued to affect families across the region, including her own. Depression and psychosocial trauma were widespread, the COVID-19 pandemic and economic crisis intensified already fragile lives. In 2021, Lokamatha’s husband took his life, leaving her with profound grief and the full responsibility of caring for their children and repaying debts.

Becoming the sole breadwinner was overwhelming.  The trauma of her husband's loss left the family emotionally scarred. Although she struggled with depression herself, she found solace in her cultivation work and in caring for her children.

In 2022, Lokamatha was invited to a village meeting of the Amara Forum, a community network established by VILUTHU for war-affected and women-headed families to define themselves and find meaning in a safe space. Attending these meetings gave her strength and hope, and it became a turning point in her life.

These meetings provided information, practical guidance, and empowerment. Discussions ranged from women’s rights and accessing government services to the Right to Information Act, voting, dignified menstruation, and hygiene. Complex topics were explained in simple, accessible ways. What seemed impossible became possible. Whether it was accessing government services, finding someone to assist or guide, or connecting with the right resource person, women could now navigate the system with a better understanding.

She felt as though she was regaining an education she had lost due to the war and her life circumstances. Guided by training on governance, mobilization, and community advocacy, she and others in the group found the strength to turn quiet endurance into active participation, influencing decisions that shaped their lives. Lokamatha also enhanced her knowledge on cultivation methods, composting, and seed sharing that improved her harvests and helped her reconnect with others facing similar situations, easing her depression and regaining her purpose. She also passes these teachings on to her children.

"Cultivation is not always easy. Some seasons are good, others are not, and the market is always uncertain. Even in good years, prices can drop and produce may go unsold, but at least I can earn something to feed my family,” she says.

Lokamatha is glad for the links and connections VILUTHU has helped build. She does not feel alone anymore.

The emotional and psychosocial support she received from other women in the forum has been a source of strength. This network also helped her face practical challenges, such as repaying her husband’s debt. Although microfinance was available, VILUTHU's awareness programs taught her about the traps of these loans. She explored other alternatives, like accessing Samurdhi, a government poverty alleviation program.

She warns other women to be careful: “Don’t be fooled by people who give money freely. In return, they will ask for more than just the money.”

Today, she offers the same support to new members, helping them access resources, understand their rights, and navigate financial and social challenges.

She is no stranger to life’s struggles and believes that relying on one’s own strength is a first step, but accessing knowledge has made her realize her own potential, and that of women in general. She has passed this message down to her three children and hopes the next generation can make a better life.